There’s a man at Rendezvous named “Burrito Bob.”  I’m not actually sure if that’s his name or if that’s just what my kids have named him.  Regardless, he’s Bob to me.  He sells burritos from his tent.  He has a sign that says, “World Famous Since 1989.”  I’m not sure what he is famous for, but I’m pretty sure it’s not the burritos.

Mr. E and the kids love these burritos.  In fact, they were so hooked on them that they successfully duplicated them at home.  They opened a can of Hormel chili with no beans and put some on a tortilla shell with some cheese.  Then, Mr. Everything folded them just perfectly (of course they were perfect), and he and the kids toasted them in a pan.  They loved them.  I found them disgusting.

The home version is not nearly as disgusting as the Rendezvous version.  I think that’s because of Burrito Bob’s appearance.  He runs around all week barefoot.  He has a scraggily beard, and he just looks dirty.  He typically doesn’t have a shirt on, though he does put it on for special occasions, like days when the general public will be at Rendezvous.  More than anything, he’s got a wild look in his eyes.  He might be the nicest guy you’ve ever met (I don’t know because I’ve never talked to him), but I just don’t have a good feeling about him.  I certainly don’t want to eat his burritos.  I caught a rare glimpse of Bob with a shirt.  Let me just assure you that the photo does not do him justice.


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Disguise added to protect Bob
What we find interesting is to watch Burrito Bob’s prices during the week.  To start out, burritos are $1.  I’m pretty sure that’s to get the men and children hooked.  Then, the prices climb through the week and vary day to day.  He uses a chalkboard for his price sign.  Smart man.  On Thursday, Friday and Saturday, when the public is allowed into Rendezvous wearing their normal 2013 attire, Burrito Bob’s prices skyrocket to $5 or $6.  Plus, he looks neatly dressed (as much as possible) that day.  It’s amazing.

I’ve noticed that all the prices go up during the public days.  I guess they figure if people want to pay money to gawk at us as we wear old clothes and stand in a field, they should pay for the privilege.

The butt-cheeks are there for the whole week, but they certainly come out for the public days.  They are just down the road from Bob and his burritos.  Those would be the Native Americans.  They are a breed all on their own.

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If you look around, you can see the butt-cheeks of men old and young.  And again, the photos do not show the whole picture.  You have to see the loin cloths in person when the wind is blowing.  A still life just isn’t the same.

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I’m pretty sure this boy is not Native American, unless it goes way, way back in his ancestry.  I hope he was wearing sunscreen today, or his pale skin is going to be hurting tonight!  Don’t you know, some day, when he’s married with kids, he is going to blame his mother for letting him wear this?  Somehow, it’s always the mother’s fault.

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The Native Americans have their own section of camp, and they pretty much keep to themselves.  It is fascinating to me to see their tipis with smoke coming up from them.  They have a circle in the middle of their camp that has to do with their religious ceremonies.  It has poles with feathers tied to them marking the sacred circle.  At night and in the mornings, you can hear their drums playing.  They really do add an element of authenticity to the whole Rendezvous experience.  That doesn’t mean I have gotten used to seeing the men in loin cloths.  There is nothing that can make you get used to that.  It’s a shock every time I see a half-naked (more like ¾ naked) Native American walk by.


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Now, my little Indian is a different story.  Isn’t she the cutest?  Of course, she had to add her own little “Goose” element to the outfit with the striped socks.  Only my child…
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She wanted to be a Native American.  I couldn’t afford $300 in leather to make her a costume, so I did the next best thing.  The first year she wore this outfit, she looked like a homeless child wearing a brown bag.  Luckily, the more we have washed this outfit, the more realistic looking it has become.  Also luckily, I’m not very good at sewing, and I made the outfit way too big!  It has lasted 3 years now.  Maybe, someday, the Goose can wear this and get married at Rendezvous.  Oh, I really shouldn’t even joke about that.  With my luck, she’ll really want to. -Al


P.S. Here's a picture of the Beetle too.  I didn't mention him in the story, but he's too cute not to show.  I think he is in the witness protection program.  That's why he's hiding his identity with his tomahawk.  And, yes, apparently, I am crazy enough to trust my children with sharp objects.  Notice the Goose's knife above...

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