Mr. Everything talked me into going on a nature walk with him. I knew this was not a good idea but succumbed to his charm. (Okay, actually, I knew I needed the exercise.)
When we lived in Brandon, we walked pretty often, but we were on paved sidewalks. The possibilities of seeing a snake or a bear or worse were not very good. On a walk in the woods, the chances would be increased significantly. I was a nervous wreck, to say the least.
Notice how fast the man was walking. How was I supposed to keep up with that while tripping over roots and vines? Now, keeping in mind that I fall a lot and Mr. E always misses it when I do, was this the best place for him to be walking? Will the man ever learn? He could have left me on the ground in the woods, and he would never know it, because he never looked back!
Actually, though, I was happy for him to be ahead of me. It meant that he could knock down all the spider webs.
Before we even got off the porch, we saw a deer. Can you find it? It's like the Florida Bible Camp version of "Where's Waldo?"
I was hoping this would be the only kind of wildlife I saw.
As we got to the back of the property (or at least as far back as this city-girl was going) I learned that the grass is, indeed, greener on the other side of the fence.
Mr. E kept reminding me that I was slow. I kept reminding him that I had birthed two children for him. He reminded me that the last one was 12 years ago. I told him just to be quiet. He told me to speed up. I told him that I was doing my best and that I didn't ask to go on this little walk of his. He said, "Ew," and ducked. He had been hit in the head with a spider web. I tried not to laugh out loud.
We kept seeing dead sticks along the way. They seemed to be grouped like these. Mr. E said they just fell like that, but it looked like the beginning of a nest to me. I was convinced it was Skunk Ape. (Also known as "Big Foot.")
When we came upon this tree, I checked overhead for buzzards. Good news. They weren't circling, so I wasn't dead yet.
I'll just call this "Exhibit A" for my murder trial against Skunk Ape.
I kept asking what lived in the holes. There were a lot of them. Mr. Everything said it was probably cute little bunny rabbits. I'm pretty sure he was just humoring me.
Mr. E said he wasn't taking me on a walk in the woods again. I just don't know why. I thought we had fun.
This is what Mr. E looked like after our walk. You'll notice there is barely a glisten.
By the way, that's a really weird look on his face. He either looks wise or creepy. I'm not sure which.
This is what I looked like after our walk. The Beetle and the Goose thought it was hilarious that I was so sweaty and Mr. E was not. I laughed with them and then gave them a big hug. That'll teach them. -Al