You see, I have some of you convinced that my life is an adventure, and some days, it is. More times than not, though, my life just involves working, homeschooling my kids and going to church. Exciting, right? I know.
Don’t get me wrong; all three of those subjects can provide hours of entertainment, unless they all decide to be boring at once. Then, I’ve got nothing.
This past week has been like that. Everything has been pretty calm. We’ve had the occasional trip to Gainesville, but that really is not exciting. I didn’t even see the old half-naked cowboy this week. Otherwise, I’ve worked.
I will tell you that last week, while working, I made the proclamation that you should never, ever, ever use the phrase, “My guest and I’s.” I actually read that in a report. After my head stopped spinning, I posted a declaration on Facebook that you should never, ever, ever use that phrase. Ever. And I mean it. If you are ever tempted to use that phrase, come see me. I’ll smack you back into good grammar.
This past weekend, we went to an area-wide sing at church. That was fun. Sort of. Suffice it to say that at our new little church in the country, I’m considered a good singer. People have actually told me that I had a nice voice. Bless their hearts. I really do like the people at my new church. I like them even more when they say I'm a good singer. No one has ever told me that before!
At this sing, we sang for an hour and a half straight. I enjoyed it. I love to sing, and in that church, with those people, I can sing as loud as I want. It doesn’t matter, because they think I'm a good singer. The Goose gave up singing about 45 minutes into it. By the end of the hour and a half, the Beetle acted like he was shooting himself in the head every time I looked at him. Mr. Everything was glazed over and not responding. A great time was had by all.
The real excitement of the evening was the meal after the singing. The preacher barbecued a bunch of brisket, pork and goat. Yes, goat. I, being the brave soul that I am, gave it a try. It wasn’t baaaaaad. (Sorry. Baaaaad humor.) It tasted like beef. I had a hard time eating it, though, because every time I went to take a bite, the Beetle said, “Naaaaa.” (How exactly do you spell a goat’s noise?) He had been making goat noises at me all week leading up to the dinner. Then, his grand finale came as I attempted to eat the poor critter. Although it tasted pretty good, I’m pretty sure I won’t be eating goat again. I caaaaan’t think about it without hearing the sound.
Today, the kids and I started school. First, I went for an extra long walk with Mr. Everything. I’ll do anything to avoid school, including exercise. All the way back, I asked him if he was sure homeschooling our kids was a good idea. I told him that maybe they would do better in public school. He reminded me that the ship had sailed a long time ago on that subject, and that I was in it, for good or for bad. I was pretty sure the bad was coming.
I went in, sucked it up and started school. I figured at least I would have something to blog about. The little beasties must have known that I was looking for material, though, because they were on their best behavior. We survived a whole day of school without an argument, a battle or crying. (That would be me crying.) The little angels were, well, angels!
After school, they each did their chores without argument. Really. I can’t make this stuff up. They worked peaceably side by side and never even shoved each other out of the way. I’m pretty sure the end of the world is near.
So, just when I thought I could count on my kids to give me something to write about, I was wrong. They wouldn’t even cooperate by not cooperating!
All in all, it has been a boring few weeks at the Not Your Average house. Eat, sleep, work. That’s how we roll. Oh, yes, and now we can add school to that list. Yay.
I’m about to the point of following my family around while holding a pen and paper so I can use anything they say against them. If you are considering meeting me for lunch anytime soon, you might want to rethink that. Otherwise, you might be just the inspiration I need for something interesting to say! Any volunteers?